Read the title again, and then take a moment to let it sink in. That statement came out during a bit of joking around in group last night, but it’s so close to some men’s reality that I had to post about it today.
If you haven’t gotten the joke yet, here it is: You can’t learn a real world skill in the virtual world. Sure, you can read about it, and that’s a good start. But at some point, you’ve got to log off, get out of the house, and start talking to people in order to learn how to talk to people.
Doesn’t that just make sense?
Then why do so many men think they can study their way to good social skills?
Seriously, search the internet. There are innumerable websites, online workshops, webinars, online discussion forums, ebooks, and audio books. They claim to teach you how to be more socially successful, whether it’s approaching women, succeeding in business relationships, or just overcoming general shyness.
I’m sure all of the authors and creators of those things assumed (or at least hoped) that their readers would have the sense to eventually try putting the principles they learned into practice. Yet so many do not, and then they have the nerve to wonder why they still don’t have any friends.
There is no way around it. To learn to play piano, you can read about music theory all you want, but eventually you have to sit down at a piano and play something over and over until you get it right. To learn to bake a cake, you can look at cookbooks until your eyes fall out, but eventually you have to go get some actual ingredients and try to do it yourself.
To learn to talk comfortably to people, you can take all the online courses you can afford, but eventually you have to get yourself out of the house and actually talk to some people. You have to do it over and over until it becomes part of you. That takes time, effort, and risk, and that’s why so many men avoid it.
Don’t be one of those guys. Take the risk, accept that it will be hard at first, but know that it will become easier, if you just do it.
This is the reason I’m incorporating a “hands-on social night” into my next Get Your Balls Back workshop. It’s one thing to teach a failure-proof 3-step process for meeting new people. It’s quite another to take guys out on the town, demonstrate it to them, and make them practice it themselves.
But that’s the only way to truly learn this or any other skill. Not from a computer. By doing it. Over and over.
Are you ready to take that next step, and move from reading to doing? Get Your Balls Back starts July 1st, and registration is open now. Hope to see you there.